The Fish

My guest today told me about a problem with his fish. In a class he is taking, the professor asked each student to introduce him or herself and share an interesting personal tidbit. My guest mentioned that he has nine fish. Somehow, my guest forgot he actually owns ten fish, and forgetting to mention the tenth made him feel guilty.

My guest owns these fish because his brother has a grandmother who is trying to empty out her estate before she dies by giving cash gifts to her family. The brother used those gifts to purchase progressively larger fish tanks, the largest of which is several hundred gallons in size. The brother gifted several smaller tanks to my guest. The brother also gifted my guest several fish, many of which the brother had bred himself.

The problem arose when the brother gave my guest a fish who was fighting with another male of the same breed in the brother's tank. When the new fish was introduced into my guest's tank, a smaller fish began attacking it mercilessly. The smaller fish ripped chunks off of the new fish's fins. The assault was so vicious that the larger fish has been hiding full-time behind the only piece of cover in the tank: the thermometer. The victimized fish had to orient itself vertically to hide effectively behind the thermometer. It was so scared it wouldn't even come out for feedings.

My guest reacted in the only sensible way: he removed the victim from the tank and placed it in a bucket. The victim remained in the bucket overnight as my guest readied its new tank. Apparently, the victim fish continues to live in terror. Through the night it apparently did not move, and made no effort to eat the food offered to it. It used the barest strokes of its ragged fins to maintain its position. I wish it a speedy recovery. Perhaps a little Zoloft in the water would help it recover from its apparent PTSD.

For more information on using human anti-psychotics to treat pets, see this This American Life episode where veterinarians gave Harriet the Hedgehog some anti-psychotic drugs to help it recover from cancer surgery. The segment about pet health insurance starts at 31:26, with the bit about the hedgehog starting at 39:19. You will also learn about how to sedate a hedgehog.